Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize