No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
