i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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