I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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