How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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