um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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