well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
