I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
