rhymes with "ouble enetration"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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