I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
