Define "chronic" masturbator.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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