I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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