Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
don't judge my taste in strippers
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
