Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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