Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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