youre lurking in front of me
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
