Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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