Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
