woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
