we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
