There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
