were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
