Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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