I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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