I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
