why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
my liver is dry heaving
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
