He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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