Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
