If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
