Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Randomize
