why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Your topless pictures make me question reality
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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