Moan for me like Helen Keller
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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