In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
