But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
