I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
