Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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