Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
