How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
