I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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