Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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