we're blogging at a bar
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
