So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
