dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
