you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
