What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
