Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
