just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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