like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
