I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
