i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
